I’m the victim of a savage Croc attack

My daughter has threatened to disown me if I ever go out in public wearing my Crocs.

I've got two, but you get the idea

So what’s the problem? Crocs might not be the height of fashion but they’re comfortable, practical and unbreakable.

They’re the perfect solution for something casual to slip into.

But even when my daughter isn’t around I now am compelled to remove the Crocs and wear something more “acceptable” when I leave the house. It’s so bad that when I now see other people at the shopping centre wearing Crocs (especially the bright orange ones) that I fain a chuckle. While deep down I admire their courage.

In reality I’ve become a closet Crocs fancier and after shopping I race home, kick off the Rockports and ease on the Crocs. It’s like leading two lives.

Now I know how Kim Philby felt.

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